Idiot Wind
(Original version)

Someone's got it in for me, they're planting stories in the press
Whoever it is I wish they'd cut it out quick, when they will I can only guess
They say I shot a man named Gray and took his wife to Italy
She inherited a million bucks and when she died it came to me
I can't help it if I'm lucky.

People see me all the time and they just can't remember how to act
Their minds are filled with big ideas, images and distorted facts
And even you yesterday, you had to ask me where it was at,
I couldn't believe after all these years, you didn't know me any better than that,
Sweet lady

Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your mouth
Blowing down the back roads headin' south
Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your teeth
You're an idiot babe,
It's a wonder that you still know how to breathe.

I threw the I Ching yesterday, it said there might be some thunder at the well
Peace and quiet's been avoiding me for so long, it seems like livin' hell
There's a lone soldier on the hill watching fallin' raindrops pour
You'd never know it to look at him, but at the final shot he won the war
After losing every battle.

I woke up on the roadside, daydreamin' about the way things sometimes are
Hoofbeats poundin' in my head at breakneck speed and makin' me see stars
You hurt the ones that I love best and cover up the truth with lies
One day you'll be in the ditch, flies buzzing around your eyes
Blood on your saddle.

Idiot wind, blowing through the flowers on your tomb
Blowing through the curtains in your room
Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your teeth
You're an idiot babe,
It's a wonder that you still know how to breathe.

It was gravity which pulled us in, and destiny which broke us apart
You tamed the lion in my cage but it just wasn't enough to change my heart
Now everything's a little upside down as a matter of fact the wheels have stopped
What's good is bad, what's bad is good, you'll find out when you reach the top
You're on the bottom

I noticed at the ceremony that you left all your bags behind
The driver came in after you left, he gave them all to me, and then he resigned
The priest wore black on the seventh day, waltzed around while the building burned
You didn't trust me for a minute, babe, I've never known the spring to turn
So quickly into autumn.

Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your jaw
From the Grand Coulee Dam to the Mardi Gras
Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your teeth
You're an idiot babe,
It's a wonder that you still know how to breathe.

We pushed each other a little too far and one day it just jumped into a raging storm
A hound dog bayed behind your trees, as I was packin' up my uniform
I figured I'd lost you anyway, why go on, what's the use?
In order to get in a word with you, I'd had to come up with some excuse
And that just struck me kinda funny.

I've been double-crossed too much, at times I think I've almost lost my mind
Lady killers load dice on me, behind my back, while imitators steal me blind
You close your eyes and part your lips and slip your fingers from your glove
You can have the best there is, but it's gonna cost you all your love
You won't get it for money.

Idiot wind, blowing through the buttons of our coats,
Blowing through the letters that we wrote
Idiot wind, blowing through the dust upon our shelves
We're idiots babe,
It's a wonder we can even feed ourselves.